Friday, January 27, 2006

Fear and loaving...

The first time Gary Porter submitted we had to scramble. He sends in those little tapes that go with dictation machines and our academie-issue machine was being used in an Aconcci-type experiment not so easily interuppted. One of us finally had to call our dad and ask him to send out the one we got for our 16th birthday. Anyway Gary is great. He never really made it on the stand up circuit, cheifly because he was at his best alone in the kitchen. It was rare that he could maintain his flow even when unwrapping a tape and putting it into the mini-dic. But that's just the kind of performer that gets made in the academie, or at least DonKay 1430. We also heard he's popular in Denmark. Anyway here's a little bit that highlights the mood of December 2002. In the background you can hear water running.

Shit, I splattered that toilet.
I turned that shit into a crime scene.
Shit, can I get a crime scene up in here?
Can I get some yellow tape?
Shit,
code whatevah!
That's what I got.

Got some dishes to do too.
Shit.
But that was a crime scene.
That was code baDOW.
That was code Too-Late.
Guess that's why it's a crime scene.
Let me hollah.